Owl City

One time I was listening to the radio, and the Postal Service came on with a new song. I said to myself, "Wow! The Postal Service on the radio, and with a new song!" I didn't know how to feel about the Postal Service being on top 40 radio. The next thing I told myself was, "THIS SONG SUCKS!" and everything I had ever come to believe in came crashing down around me. My world as I knew it was destroyed in a musical holocaust.

Luckily all hope was saved when I realized I wasn't even listening to the Postal Service.


Owl City is the music project of Adam Young, apparently a grown man still being molested by his father. He claims the Postal Service, and Boards of Canada as influences, but can't seem to be influenced enough by those two great bands to make actual good music. Let's analyze this for a second:

The Postal Service recorded several good songs on their debut album "Give Up," blending elements of IDM and indie rock, and managed to make cheesy love songs sound good.

The Boards of Canada recorded several good albums full of IDM music, including "Music has the Right to Children," and "The Campfire Headphase," creating chill soundscapes and warm music textures.


Let me stop sounding like the music reviewer for a shitty hipster magazine for a second, to tell you that Owl City can't even accomplish anything either of those bands did. Instead it's just a bad rip off, with a twist, it's commercial as fuck. It's music that you throw on top 40 radio when you need some filler in between the car commercials and the vapid female disc jockey talking about the 98 Degrees reunion tour.

If anything I've said so far, doesn't give you any clues as to how gay this really is, the following list of song titles will;

Vanilla Twilight

Fireflies

Strawberry Avalanche

The Saltwater Room

The Christmas Song

So not only does Adam Young half ass ripping off his influences, but apparently he can't be bothered to come up with song titles that don't sound like flavors of douche. Then again I really have to keep telling myself that this shit is called Owl City. So you can't really expect someone who can't even come up with a decent name, to put any effort into anything else. Even the vocals have the least effort possible. Basically Adam Young threw them together in about two minutes, ran them through several filters and an auto tuner, and called it a day, thus again half assing, only this time in trying to sound like Ben Gibbard, who can actually sing.



In the end, if you actually like Owl City, then you're just ripping of fans of good music, and half assing it too.

Fuck you.


Owl City gets 0 out of 5 stars.

Click here if you're dumb enough to listen