Dot Dot Curve

I've been called many names by people. Names like "prodigy," "talented," and "faggot." So I know a thing or two about music. As an elitist hipster musician, I'm all about the talent. That's why I write this blog. Because I get off on picking apart other musicians who are lesser, instead of praising musicians who are better. There's a reason for that too. It's nothing deep, I just don't like sucking dick is all.

There is this "experimental" band called Dot Dot Curve. Now the world of experimental music is interesting, because it's never the same twice. Really you can call anything experimental and make people listen to it. Often it's just a mix of two or three genres, and the artist will call it a day. That's what Dot Dot Curve did, only they mixed more than two or three genres. We have club music, emo, rap, and the sound of the artist's molestation as a child in the background.

Pictured: Our "experimental musician
wondering, "Why are you listening
to this?"and "Where is my manhood?"

The first song I listened to is called "Take a Picture" which opens with the lyric, "Take a razor to my neck" and this is probably one of the first times in my life where I wish people would take lyrics literally. I usually suggest against that sort of thing, because it gets artists into a lot of trouble, which gets religious people in a ferver. But this time won't someone please take this lyric seriously. I beg of you! The song is a mixture of club music and emo, and of course that molestation thing I mentioned earlier. I guess recording that came in handy, but I hate this song.

The next track I punished myself with is called, "CrunkaMOFUKKalicious" and I wish I were joking. This sounds like Little John, and the Molestation Tabernacle Choir. No shit. In this the artist has the audacity to use the lyric, "You say my music sucks," Well no shit I say your music sucks. That's because it does. Then he goes on to say, "Suck my nuts." It's at this point I wonder if that's some of the lyrics, or something overheard during the molestation.

The artist is reaching for straws when he wrote his opus though, "CuntsickleStick." "CuntsickleStick" is a look into the artist's soul, as he lashes out at a world that shunned him. He wants to "Explode on your ass" and while I'm not sure if that means he wants to ejaculate or beat someone up, I'm sure I don't want to know. But I guess he's taunting the listener to "keep on staring" so it must be some of that club posteuring, with empty threats to beat someone's ass, which is ironic considering the artist looks like he just stepped off the bus from the town of Limp Wrist, on a pitstop along the way to Homoville.

Overall, don't say I warned you. If you subject yourself to this, don't you ever say I didn't warn you.

0 out of 5 stars

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